God save our ears!

At the end of August, you might have seen the below clip of a Libyan military band butchering God Save the Queen when playing it for British foreign secretary/buffoon Boris Johnson:

It is very funny.

But I did feel slightly sorry for the Libyans when that clip emerged as few people pointed out that they’re far from alone in butchering anthems, even in the Middle East. So, please, let me jog your memories of the wonders of the Egyptian military band – and especially the time they played Russia’s national anthem to Vladimir Putin:

A-hahahahahahahaha!

Jeremy Corbyn! Bloody hell!

As you’ve probably seen from today’s newspapers, Jeremy Corbyn didn’t sing God Save the Queen yesterday. OMG!

You could argue he should have sung it given his position – the Guardian takes that view today – but personally I think there are many reasons why everyone in the UK should stop singing the song. If you want to learn them, either read this piece I just wrote for the Telegraph or read my book, specifically the chapter picture below, which looks like it’s about Liechtenstein, but isn’t!

For any casual visitor to this site, no, I’m not a republican like Corbyn, my book’s just named after Paraguay’s national anthem! Stop ordering me to emigrate!